Day 19-3/29-Gatlinburg, TN-Zero miles

Gatlinburg was entirely as touristy as I remembered and then some. The day consisted mostly of trying to find a legitimate local restaurant to ravage. Crawdaddies sounded the most appetizing for lunch, but surprising a list of about five different types of po' boys did not have a crawfish variety among them. I was informed that they did not stock peeled crawfish, and in fact the only item on their menu worthy of their name was broiled crawfish. A grouper po' boy, seafood gumbo, and lobster mac and cheese rounded out the ordering, and I was saddled with an overly friendly waitress for the entire length of the meal. After gathering enough information about me to write a small biography, I was able to chew enough to finish  my food. I went back to the hotel, did some laundry, and took a nap. The best I could manage for dinner was Johnny Rocket's, but the staff was entertaining enough to make the food bearable. I neglected to visit one of the 17 different variations of museums Ripley's has been kind enough to contribute to the local culture, and went to bed early. Don't go to Gatlinburg unless someone is paying you.